Saturday, 11 February 2012

My Daddy will be happy with Noah up in Heaven

Harri had been having a really hard time since Noah passed away. He was struggling so much with it that we started to take him to a child psychologist so we could get some strategies of how to help him the best.  She said that Harri was actually suffering from trauma and couldn't grieve properly until he had worked through the trauma.

He had been getting a lot better in the last few weeks before Aaron passed away, but now he's of course worse than he ever was since Noah passed away. I know it's going to be a long road to help him feel secure and safe and happy again, especially as he saw a lot of what was going on when Aaron passed away.

As we were driving back from St Helens Harri said from the back seat 'when I talk at Daddy's funeral it's going to be a lot longer than my talk at Noah's funeral'. I hadn't even asked him if he wanted to talk yet, but he knew he had a lot of things to tell about Aaron, that he wanted people to know.

When we viewed Aaron's body the day that he was dressed Harri didn't want to touch him or be close to him, but at the funeral he was quite happy to be close and even touched his body.

I was so proud of him all day.   He really wanted to 'help Daddy' by handing out his funeral programs. 

He did such a good job with his talk which he wrote himself.  I offered to stand up with him, but he said he would be okay by himeslf.  He even stumbled across a couple of words, and then took a deep breath and corrected himself and kept going. When he came and sat back down he looked at me and said 'you changed it Mum!' (as the wording that he wrote sounded strange) and he wasn't very happy with me.  Later he told me that he made a mistake with his talk, but he thought 'all these people are listening to me, so I just kept going'.

This was the talk that he wrote himself. 

I love my Daddy.

My Daddy taught me all about sports.

He taught me all about American football, cricket, AFL, basketball, ice hockey and he used to watch fun things with me like sport, the Disney Channel and Star Wars.

My Dad made funny jokes. The funniest one was when Noah was a baby and I was bawling my head off and Dad said Noah was looking at me wondering why I was crying and looked at me like ‘whatever!’.

He taught me about the computer, and how to do special drawings.

And he taught me how to fish and how to be happy and not be naughty.

I liked to play with Daddy at the pool and the park and at home.  He always helped me put my Lego together.

We liked to wrestle and I always won!

He always taught me to be a brave boy when someone dies like Noah.  When I get scared he taught me not to get scared and tried to make me feel happy in my own room and not get scared. Every Friday night daddy and I  used to watch Friday night football.

At 5.00 am every morning daddy got up and watched American football. My daddy makes the funniest jokes in the world.

My daddy will be happy with Noah up in heaven.


  1. Harri, You did such a fantastic job giving your speech about your Dad. He would have been so very proud of you. I don't even know you and I was super proud of you for being so brave even though you were so sad.

  2. It's so nice that the boys were able to say something to their dad. You are all such an amazing family :D

  3. Your children are so brave and so beautiful, what a wonderful chance to say goodbye to his dad and tell him how much he loved him.

  4. How incredible! The words about him, and his own words permeate his incredible spirit. I wish for you all to come to American and see a football game. You would be welcome to stay with my family for your visit!

  5. Harri was so brave and so cute.

    He'll get through it. :)

  6. Harri did a beautiful job with his eulogy to his Dad. You can certainly feel the love in his talk.

  7. What a precious son you have. Good job, Harri. Thinking of all of you on this snowy day in Pennsylvania USA

  8. I can't imagine all these emotions you are going through now- you must be entirely exhausted, from pure grief to pure pride in your sons and the way they've stood in front of people and expressed their love for their dad. As I said in a previous comment I am so sorry for what you have had to go through in the last 3 months and what's ahead of you. For what it's worth you and your boys have been on my mind since I first was directed to your blog- I only wish a simple thought could make a difference and help out your broken heart.

  9. So sweet.
    What strong young men you are raising.
    (((HUGS))) to you all.

  10. Beautiful. And the!

  11. What a brave strong young man Harri showed himself to be. Your dad is proud of you, Harri.

  12. Your a brave boy Harri, your Dad and Noah would have loved hearing your speech. x

  13. Lisa, you and your wonderful family have touched my heart in a way that I cant describe.

    Each day I read your blog and The tears constantly flow.

    My husband, also 39, suffered a heart attack on 4 Jan this year. Fortunately things turned out ok. I can only imagine what you are going through. Your strength and courage to go on every day for your wonderful boys is amazing.

    Take care of you and your family. You really are an amazingly strong woman.

    Sydney NSW

  14. I think at the funeral he said 'sneaked out' at 5am to watch American football. I loved that - so like Aaron to sneak around! Harri, you're a champ. Xxx

  15. All of your boys are gorgeous and special in their own unique way. I was very touched at the post about Jay too. You have some very strong spirits in your family xx

  16. Fantastic Harri, what a great tribute to your Dad...I have a Harry boy and they are beautiful sensitive souls :)

  17. Sweet boy, he is. Heavenly Father has something special for him in his life, i know it.

  18. lisa,Harri,jalen,Kobe..hello down Under!! Well, Did you all watch the Superbowl? I know it was on early,like early,isn't it weird when us oldies(what am I saying?) catch on to the hip hop jargon of today?I mean, let's hype about the hip hop,and like ..just,like it!Where that came from..yes, I do have an idea.I went to the Temple today,here in Denver,Colorado,it had snow-flurried during the night ..the snow was crisp -crunchy,and at times..held my weight,so cold it was(walking Jordi early) must have been 10'f. my nose was stinging as it felt like icicles growing, Jordi was running around on the snow. I woke up awake(lol) happy and ready for the day,off I drove..I had planned to do the one family Endowment I had.,hmm,couldn't find it,however, a Sister told me,when I asked,that baptisms were being done today.. I had a few of those. youth from Nebraska and Greeley were here,I had 11 ladies and 6 gentlemen;I am now feeling the aches of,how can I say being baptized by immersion 11 times as a 52 year old with chronic arthritis..funnily, with the deepest respect for a sacred Ordinance?.well, you get it,I loved that "session" everyone was so helpful ,kind ,friendly,so much was I a part of the current goings on and thoroughly enjoying the communication between those spirits long gone from this world and ME.I know they were with me when I woke up this morning.this was their day..the start of the longed for journey back to the presence of our Heavenly Father.Are you still with me?.'cos I am not,
    so,on my arrival at the Temple,I had a few more names to get printed ..while I was waiting..the little notes for the Prayer Roll was just at my left on the counter...I looked..I had a flash thought put in my head... I wrote names down...Lisa King
    Harri King
    Kobe King
    Jalen King
    Heidi Wardle
    Madison Thompson-worthington
    I tried to put you boys in the right order of oldest to youngest, my hand did not obey ...Harri..your dad loves and remembers you all;for today,tho,I know he had an especial thought for became so clear as I clicked on your Mum's blog before I went nite-nites....when I drove away from the Temple,today, I looked back..and had the thought to stop and take a picture,the silver light of a snow-sky touched my soul,alas..the world was around me, a car behind me so.I did not do as I was told...Have you heard 'that" voice tell you it a question,.a order or demand...however one perceives the tone ...and you have chosen to not act upon the wisdom of the Holy Ghost. I have that picture of the Denver Temple in my mind..I am so sorry that you cannot see it too.. cos I didn't stop. I really thought I would be feeling the presence of Aaron and Noah while in the Temple today.They knew my attention was with my ancestors... and I am sure those two boys had things to do ,too... I know I was remembered and that Aaron walked out of the Temple with me ..I got a bit mad at me for not acting on that gentle nudge.."take a picture"..especially as an image of Lisa came to mind... no names were mentioned tho,uncanny,the use of imagery as communication ,writing has a way of recalling what was not apparent at the time,hind sight is usually 20/20.. our friends and family can reach out to touch our hearts through the shifting veil...that we may be comforted by the Holy Ghost as He brings the essence of those Spirits gone from us;to have that brief yet knowing calm and lean on me..keep going ,you will make it..I'll be waiting,tangible FAITH...
    CTR boys ,young men and you will hold on.and will be prepared for the callings He has for you,we have only just begun.
    Hopefully this makes sense,let me know;I will clarify. take care, I will take photos of the Denver Temple.

  19. That was a beautiful speak Harri, one you should be very proud of.

  20. I just want to let you know that all of you are in my prayers, especially Harri at this time.

  21. It is a wise, generous and humble mother who reaches out and seeks support as you have and are doing. In your anguish, don't under-estimate this and how much it will heal your children.

  22. You are doing a beautiful job handling your childrens' needs. They are what will keep you going and getting out of bed in the morning. When my husband passed suddenly 7 years ago, my boys were 2, 8 and 12. We stuck to each other like glue for the first six or seven months afterwards. That gave them a sense of security I think. Your strength will let them know that everything will be okay. But please don't feel like you have to be strong all of the time. For me, the only thing that made things easier was taking things one day at a time. The thought of looking past just that one day that I was living in was too overwhelming so I chose not to. I often would take things one hour or even one minute at a time. My heart is so sad for you as a mother and as a wife. I will keep you in my prayers and, if you ever want to just "chat" with someone who has been thru the loss of a husband I'm here. Take care and God bless. "One Day at a Time." XOXOXO

    ~ Wendy

  23. You don't know me. Your story has really touched me. I'm a mother too (I live in Brisbane.)

    I'm so sorry for your loss.

    Praying for you and your family. . .


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