Monday 30 January 2012

Please tell your Dad

that I'm sorry that I yelled that I needed him and he had to breath.  I still do need him and I wish he was breathing, and talking, and walking, and joking, and holding me right now.   But I know you and Dad needed to be together for some reason, but it's so hard to take.  

It's hard to understand, and it's hard to see how I'm going to live without both of you. 

But I have to.

Please hug your Dad for me and tell him how much I love and miss him very much.

Even though my thoughts are consumed with your Dad at the moment, you are also on my mind as I wonder what you are doing together.   I hope you were both watching us today as your cousins came to play with your brothers. They loved having them here, and it made me happy to see them having so much fun together.   Chloe and Kelsea were so cute picking my herbs for me out of Daddy's veggie patch (that didn't really need to be picked) so I didn't 'have to do so much work'.  

Tell Dad that Uncle Eden fixed that silly blind that we could never fix properly.  He said it's 'never, ever coming down again'.  I'm sure Dad will be happy about that :)


29 comments:

  1. love you Lisa x Chels

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  2. You and your family are very loved by everyone and I hope that can bring you even the smallest bit of comfort with so much sadness at the moment xxx

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  3. from Canada...a friend of your friend Alison's. gutted for you and just wanted to say i am so very, very sorry. and so very, very moved by your words...both about Aaron and Noah. sounds like you have both love and courage, in spades...wishing you a constant supply.

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  4. Dear Noah. Alison here. (I miss you). Please tell your Dad that even though there are hundreds and thousands (like the sprinkles) of people who are so proud of your Mum, we know that none of them are as proud as he is. I know how your Dad likes to have his feelings made known. Alright. Good. (I miss you).

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  5. I Can't stop thinking and praying for you and your boys. This breaks my heart and I know there are no words that will make things better. Aaron's heart must have been so broken after losing Noah. What a wonderful Dad. You are so loved and I'm so happy you have your big wonderful family and many friends to help you through the next forever. You are one amazing woman and Aaron is so lucky to still have you on earth raising his boys. Thank you for your outlook on life. Not just through adversity and challenges but always. This tragedy doesn't define the kind of person you are at all, you have always been this amazing strong person and it has just allowed a lot more people, all over the world, to see and feel that great Love you have for others. Please let others help you get through this so you can continue to be one of the best mum's I've ever come across.

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  6. Dear Noah,
    Just a quick message because I know that your Dad and you are catching up.
    Tell your Dad I am missing him so much, and I need a house call from Dr. Steve.I have the biggest lump in my throat that won't go away.
    Your Mum is doing such a great job here, even though her heart is broken.
    She cries a lot, but she also laughs a lot, and she is getting everything together to honour your Dad's memory at church in a few days, but she will go on honouring his memory all the days of her life.
    I love how she says "remember when" and she smiles or laughs.
    I hope you and your Dad are having a great time together, and I hope that Daniel and Tamitha are with you, so when we get back together we can all have the biggest group hug ever.
    Guess what?
    Uncle Eden fixed that silly blind that was always falling down, and he said "It will never come down again"
    Kobe did make a valiant effort in trying to fix it as well.
    I miss your Dad so much, I wish I could give him a hug right now.
    Jae has stepped up to the mark being the 'man of the house'
    Your Dad would be so proud of him.I know that you and your Dad know that your Mum's brothers and sister and their partners and their children will always be here for her, and we will help out whenever she needs anything at all.
    I wonder if the angels know that Lisa is one of their best, although she lives here on earth.
    We have found a lot of angels since your Dad left, they have done and said such kind deeds.
    I hope that people will continue to do kind things, not only for Lisa and the boys, but for each other.
    I know that your Dad and you must be so happy talking and running with each other. Wow!!! I can only imagine.
    Well I had better get to bed.
    I am so glad we are a forever family.
    Love Grandma.
    xxx

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  7. I came to your blog through a FB friend, and just want to say that I am praying hard for all of you.

    =)

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  8. Heart is just aching for you all. Unimagineable loss. Will be praying for you. World seems so unfair sometimes. No words could possibly be adequete for what you must be experiencing now.

    Love from someone that doesn't know you personally xx

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  9. My heart is breaking for you. Keep remebering the good times. I hope you find confort from your beautiful boys. praying for you xxxx

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  10. Beautiful, painful words to make the soul think. Bless you Lisa.

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  11. Lisa, I recetly discovered that you had a beautiful blog honouring your gorgeous men and expressing some very deep and raw emotion. I have only ever known you via friends and at the gym but I felt compelled to tell you what an amazig, beautiful, caring wife and mother you are. You are an extraordinary woman - a woman that most women would aspire to be like. My heart aches for you and your family. Surround yourself with the love and support as I know there is a lot of love for you. Your blog is truly beautiful to read. I am sendig you my thoughts and huge hugs. Love Natalie xxx

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  12. The smiles on those two say it all!

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  13. I am so sorry. Please know you and your family are in our family's prayers. Reading your posts, I can feel your spirit and love. Sending you love and comfort.

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  14. Praying that memories will carry you through until the pain eases a little. x

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  15. Sweet beautiful Noah, please tell your Dad that we will try and look after your Mummy and brothers in the very way that he would want us to.
    XX xxxx

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  16. I am so sorry for the loss of Noah and your husband. I just wanted you to know that there are people out there thinking of you and your family during this tragic time.

    Meg

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  17. Hey Lisa, I wish I could find the words to truly convey how much your post has touched me and how amazing your strength is at this difficult time.....

    I can tell there is a lot of love and care coming your way Lisa and know that this will help you in the times ahead.

    Keeping you and your family in my prayers,

    Claire XXX

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  18. I know you don't know who I am, but I found you through Seven Cherubs and just wanted to let you know how moved I am by your story, and how terribly sad I am for the loss of your husband and son. There truly are no words.

    Sending you peace and love from afar. x

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  19. You don't know me but I heard about your blog just after your sweet Noah passed away, and I have been following it ever since. I have been amazed by your family. You and Aaron have taught me how to be a better parent to my girls. I was so shocked to check your blog the other night and see that Aaron had passed away and I have been praying for you and your boys ever since. We will never meet in this life, but know that someone in Utah is praying for you and your boys.

    Diane

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  20. I am sitting here with tears streaming down my face for your huge loss of not only your husband but beautiful Noah.

    I had a sister pass away when I was 10 (28years ago) and the similarities between her and Noah are uncanny. Memories of her have started flooding in - not that you ever forget them. She will be showing Noah the ropes up in heaven I am sure, and now he has his Dad as well, you are special enough to have 2 angels watching over you.

    Stay strong and know that there are plenty of people - both complete strangers and friends - holding you close to their hearts.

    My heart breaks for you.

    Anita

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  21. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family Lisa, I have had a similar experience to you and as much as it pains me to say it, all of those silly cliches are true ! There is a light at the end of the tunnel, even though it may not seem like it now. You seem to have a wonderful support network and i just wanted to say that your strength is inspirational and i think you are a wonderful woman. Thinking of you lots xx

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  22. keeping you in my prayers. I haven't been able to stop thinking about you and your family this week.

    Corriexxxx

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  23. My heart aches for you and your boys. You write so beautifully of your beautiful Noah and your lovely husband.

    I'm thinking of you.
    x

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  24. I "stumbled" across your blog through a facebook page and I am so deeply moved by what you have endured over the last few months with the loss of your treasured son Noah, and your soul mate Aaron. Like so many other people that have commented here I don't know you personally but I wanted to show my support to you, and let you know how much I admire your strength.

    You are suffering so deeply from these losses, and yet you have still shared your inner most thoughts and feelings, expressed so tenderly, with people from all over the world.

    I am amazed by how widespread the support is for you and your boys, but it goes to show that there are still so many wonderful people in this world willing to show love to their neighbour, even when they have never met them.

    I wish you and your boys well, and I truly hope that your pain is eased by the beautiful memories you have of Noah and Aaron.

    You are all in my thoughts and prayers.xx

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  25. You are amazingly strong Lisa. Your boys have such a wonderful role model to look up to, and I know Aaron and Noah would be proud. Thinking of you.

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  26. Sending love and support to you and your beautiful family xx

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  27. Lisa, I don't know you, only through the many friends of mine who have spoken of your story on FB. I feel heartbroken for you for your loss, I have no idea how you can cope with losing both your son and your husband within months.

    It seems you are a very brave, strong and amazing woman, and I have no doubt that the strength that you have gained by raising a highly dependent child will give you all the strength that you need to get you through another part of your life.

    I wish you loads of courage to face the future with your sons, and hope that you have many, many special memories of your darling son and your husband and best friend. Beck xxx

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We are so grateful for everyone's love and support, and appreciate your comments xoxo

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