At first it didn't feel like this Easter would be as hard as last year, and it wasn't, but it was still hard. It surprised me how grief can just creep up when you are feeling quite strong and on top of it. As soon as I got home from work last Thursday I dreaded the next few days on our own.
We would usually have brunch on Good Friday with my whole family, but this year we decided to have a family dinner on Sunday instead. On Friday morning Aaron's Dad and Step Mum Carrol and sister Kim dropped in. It was lovely to see them and show them our new house as they hadn't seen it yet. They were really happy for us and loved our house as much as we do. They brought the boys and I lots of Easter eggs, so all day Friday we pigged out on chocolate and some lovely hot cross buns which Alison's housemate had made.
I knew the only way to get through the Easter holidays without feeling too down was to keep busy, so on Friday afternoon we went to the movies. Town was absolutely deserted since all the shops were shut, so it was the perfect chance to take photos in the mall with the trees with their changing leaves. It looked beautiful, but made me feel sad that summer is definitely over.
On Friday night the beautiful Cupcake Fairy - Nic left some special Easter treats at our front door including these beautiful cupcakes.
Easter Bunny came late on Saturday night and dropped eggs all the way from the front door all the way upstairs to each of our bedrooms. Harri and Kobe were both so excited about Easter Bunny coming and had so many questions about him. It was hard to feel the same excitement when I just felt so sad that it was another Easter without Noah and Aaron
After church we went to the cemetery and put some more Easter decorations on Noah's tree. As soon as we got there Kobe's lip started quivering and he said 'I want to give Noah one of my eggs'. He pulled one out of his pocket and put it down on his grave and said 'there you go Noah' and started crying. He doesn't usually get so upset when we are there and it broke my heart to see him so sad. I told him what a lovely brother he was and he sat down and just cried and cried.
Seeing Kobe so upset set me off and we all had a good cry together.
Jay had the big job of hiding all the eggs for the Easter egg hunt.
Aunty Steph reminded the kids of the rules before they all set off.
Brendan Fevola' as he thinks he looks like him. They were then excited as they remembered on Christmas Day that he did some magic tricks for them. The boys loved it when Jonny did some more magic tricks for them again last night. On the way home I said something about the cool tricks that Jonny did and Kobe said 'who!?'. I then realised that he didn't know his name is actually Jonny, so I said 'you know - Brendan Fevola' and Kobe said 'oh yeah!' :) Sorry Jonny - I think you are always going to be known as 'Fev' from now on.