Friday 5 July 2013

{Another} New Beginning

Sometimes things happen very unexpectedly.  Aaron passing away was obviously one of those things, but sometimes good things happen when I least expect them, just like selling our home so quickly after I put it on the market.   I love being a teacher aide for kids with special needs, and I know how lucky I was to get a job straight after Noah passed away, especially as I hadn’t done any paid work for over twelve years.  

I recently decided that I needed some time - time to just think, time to myself, and time to grieve.  It was a hard decision to make, but also an easy one because I just wasn’t coping with everything.  I felt really selfish because I hate letting people down, but I knew that I needed to do it for myself and for my boys, because they need me to be as well as I can be - physically and emotionally.

I decided to take some time off work, and two weeks off turned into a month.  It was hard having nowhere to go.  It was hard getting out of bed, but I made sure that I went to the gym every day because it gave me somewhere to go and something to do, that would hopefully help me feel better.  

During my month off work I did a lot of thinking.  It made me realise that I do love working, even though it can be so hard to do everything that I need to do as a single Mum.   Even though I had a month off I knew that it is going to be a long time before I really feel much better.  By the end of the month I couldn’t wait to get back to work to see the kids again, and I was looking forward to going back to work. 
During my month off work I was able to spend some time at the boy’s school, doing parent help in their classes and also volunteering in another class.  It was nice to remember what it was like when I was a teacher, before our boys were born.  

After I graduated from Uni, I only taught for two years before I had Jalen and decided to stay at home full time.   Being a stay at home Mum was a choice that I made and something I loved, and I know how blessed I was to be able to make that choice to stay home. 

Now that it’s just me and the boys, our life is very different.  With Kobe at school three days a week and knowing he will be at school full time next year, I know that I need to really think about what I want to do with my life, because my boys aren’t going to be around forever and I no longer have the choice to stay at home, as we don’t have Aaron’s income coming in.  

I now believe that I was meant to take that time off work for a few different reasons.  I needed to do it for myself physically and emotionally, but things turned out very unexpectedly.  During my time off I was very blessed to be offered a part time teaching job at the boy’s school starting next term. 

In the last month things have changed in my life so much.  I registered to teach again, and two days ago I signed my contract for my new job as a teacher, and yesterday I resigned from my job as a teacher aide.  

I’m really going to miss the kids and staff that I work with at Newstead Heights and it will always be a special place to me, especially as it was where Noah went to school part time, but I also know that it’s time to be more confident in myself and start teaching again.   

I’m especially going to miss ‘Prank Tuesday’ which the middle class does each week, where they love to play all sorts of tricks on different people.  I love watching the boys in that class who think it’s so funny if you pretend you have really been tricked.  
Because I'm just on contract I have no idea what I will be doing next year yet, but right now I know it's a change I needed to make.  I’m very nervous, but excited for my new job as a resource/support teacher.  It means I will be able to continue working with kids with special needs.  It’s nerve wracking because I haven’t taught for fourteen years, but I know I have a lot of experience because of having Noah, and through working at Newstead Heights over the past eighteen months.  

Right now we are going to enjoy our two weeks of school holidays, before my  new job starts.  Hopefully this will be the last big change in my life for a little while now, as I don’t think I can cope with anymore just yet.

20 comments:

  1. Congratulations, it's sounds like the perfect fit for you.

    Kylie

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  2. Congratulations Lisa! It seems to have fallen in place at the right time. Best of luck - I['m sure you wont need it and will be brilliant!
    Chelsea

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  3. Very excited for you! You'll be great and the boys will only benefit.

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  4. I have read your blog for quite awhile now and I simply think you are amazing. What a brave choice, and I imagine a hard and bittersweet choice returning to teaching must be. It is beautiful that you are able to appreciate the blessings that come your way despite all the heartbreak you are going through. I wish you all the luck in the world. Thank you so much for allowing us all to read your thoughts, I can't express how humbling and inspiring I find your blog to be.

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  5. That is fantastic Lisa. I know what it's like being a single mum .... it's not always easy, but you get there one day at a time. I admire you for what you have achieved despite all that has happened. Sometimes you have to do things that you never expected. Good luck with your new beginning and may it be everything you are expecting it to be and more. Good luck!!!

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  6. I'd say it's all meant to be. I'm so glad you took that time off and I bet it felt lovely. What a wonderful teacher you are going to be, well done on getting the job.

    corrie:)

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  7. Good for you Lisa. You needed to re-group and make some hard decisions. You're boys will be proud of you and I know that you'll have lots of support when needed. All the best.

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  8. Lisa - I have been reading your blog for quite a while. You are an inspiration and an example of faith and perseverance that I find very moving. I have often prayed for you and your family, that you would know moments of joy and peace and you continue to learn how to go on living life without Noah and Aaron. I did a "happy dance" when I read this post - I'm thrilled you are going to be back in a teaching role. Yet another testament to leaving yourself open to the opportunities that God presents. I hope the challenges and joyful moments will be good for your soul! KJ from Wisconsin, USA

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  9. You will be a wonderful addition to the school and a gift to the children you teach.

    =)

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  10. Congrats to you! It sounds like it was meant to be. Enjoy it AND your boys!

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  11. What a wonderful blessing! Teaching touches lives in such a profound way. You will be incredible! This is such wonderful news. I am so excited for you because I believe teaching is one of the greatest joys in life. I suggest you get a blessing right before you begin teaching to help quiet any fears you have. Seriously, you will be incredible and it will come back to you quickly. Hooray for the new change in your life! Lots of love from all of us!

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  12. Congrats Lisa and much happiness in your new job ..Kisses for you all an exciting time ahead of you much love xxxxxx

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  13. All the best! You are a fabulous teacher! (I did two terms of just relief teaching with 5 children and found it tough!!! so give yourself a break every now and then with a few dinners at Maccas....sure takes off the pressure)

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  14. oh wow...you will be the best teacher ever Lisa...CONGRATULATIONS.... and you will have all the holidays to be with your boys...no decision could be better...XXX

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  15. Elizabeth in Georgia6 July 2013 at 14:12

    Congrats! The Lord is surely blessing you and the boys. I am glad you got some time off to think. You really haven't taken the time and I would agree with you, don't make any more major changes for awhile, you have had so many! A new job will surely bring new experiences and new life to living!! Good luck and enjoy the holiday break!

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  16. Runny I never wanted to be a teacher. Both my parents were, Dad was principal at St. Giles now Newstead Heights for 17 years whilst mum was next door at St. George's. I witnessed the stress and the constant work at home catching up that I decided not to follow in their footsteps. Teaching is definitely a calling.

    Robin

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  17. Congrats in your new career. (Or old career, coming back into your life)
    I am sure you will be awesome. Well done!
    Nic in nz

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  18. You are an inspiration! I am so happy that in the midst of all your heartbreak, you have been blessed with help from others, a new home and now a new career! You are building wonderful new life experiences for your three boys and yourself. I have been a stay-at-home Mom for 14 years and I'm scared and hesitant to get back into the work force again. Now you have given me that little spark. God bless you and your boys! ~Lisa in USA

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  19. From 1 teacher to another-you never forget x

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  20. Sounds like a wonderful opportunity for you Lisa. All the best!

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We are so grateful for everyone's love and support, and appreciate your comments xoxo

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