Time doesn't just fly when you're having fun. It flies when you are grieving too. It's crazy to think that it's been just over a year since we sold our home and moved to our 'new' house. At the time it was the hardest decision to make on my own, and I knew deep down that it was the right thing to do, but I still worried about whether I was doing the right thing.
The boys were not happy at all to sell our home we built and to move to an older house, but last week Harri said 'I love this house more than our old house, even though it's older'. When we first moved in, the boys pointed out all the things 'wrong' with the house...there are cracks in the walls and ceiling and the floors creak, but now they all tell me how much they love our 'new' house.
When we first moved here we were all worried that we were leaving Noah and Aaron behind, because we wouldn't have any memories of them here. But on the other hand that is mostly why I made the decision to move house, because it was just too sad to live in our old house. It was no longer a place that felt like home. It was a place we hated being, because they weren't there with us.
Even though they've never been in this house with us, it still feels like they are here. Sometimes we feel them really close, and other times it seems like they're so far away, but we all know that they would be so happy for us to be living here. Jay and I always talk about how much Aaron would love living here. It feels like we've been here for many years.
We now look forward to being at home. We love the light and the space, but the best thing is living so close to the boy's schools and work. Life is still so hard every day, but we are adjusting to our 'new normal'. A new house doesn't fix things at all, but I'm so glad I made that hard decision twelve months ago, as I can see it was a big turning point for all of us. It has made our lives a lot easier in may different ways.