Looking but not feeling like Christmas

The last few years we have put up our Christmas tree up on the Saturday of the Christmas parade.  Because we were away in Hobart on Saturday, we decided to put it up on Sunday.  The boys were excited to do it as always.

 Kobe was very creative and made his own little Christmas tree.

Each of the boys get a new decoration every year which we write their name and the year on. Harri kept asking if he could put Noah's decorations up for him as he searched through the boxes for all of his and Noah's decorations. 



The boys had lots of fun doing it, but Aaron and I weren't into it at all this year.  I would've been happy to just have waited for a couple of weeks to put it up, which is NOT like me at all, as I'm always begging Aaron to let me put it up early.
 
Thank you Heidi for this beautiful decoration.

Although Noah never physically helped put up the tree, I just wanted things to be the same as other years, with him snoozing away on the couch while we all put the decorations up.  I tried to hide the tears streaming down my face from the boys a few times, and just tried to make it as fun as possible for them.  Even Aaron who said he wanted to put it up, said he felt like throwing it outside by the end of it.  As much as we know where Noah is and will be with him again, it's still so hard as we try to do all the usual family things without him. I really wouldn't mind skipping Christmas all together this year. 

I'm not sure Christmas will ever feel the same again, but I'm glad we know the true meaning of Christmas.

We received these beautiful angel decorations from a friend after Noah passed away.

I just wish we could skip all of December this year, but we are hoping that we can keep things as happy as possible for the boys sake.  They are very excited for Christmas which is really nice.