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Sunday, 21 July 2019

June Birthdays

In our family all our birthdays are either in June or September, except for Aaron who had to be different and had his birthday two days before Christmas. I don't look forward to birthdays at all now that Aaron is gone (and I'm old so birthdays just aren't exciting anymore) but Kobe has enough enthusiasm and excitement to make up for my lack of. 

He was counting down to his 11th birthday for months, and begged for a birthday party this year.  Because I dread birthdays, its extra hard having a party especially when I have to plan and run it all on my own.  I just wasn't up to it this year, but I compromised with him and we planned a fun day with his best friend Kobe (even spelled the same way and they're in the same class and basketball team!) on the weekend before his birthday.  We went to the movies and saw Pokemon and then got Maccas for lunch. 
He kept asking me if he could stay home from school on his birthday, but he doesn't have a choice when I work full time.  He woke up early to open up his presents. 
The boys always get to choose what they want for tea on their birthday and he chose Kosaten which is his favourite Japanese restaurant.   
Jay was away at Uni, so it was just the three of us for tea.  He loves being able to order on the iPad and have the food come out on the train, but he also loves the food. 

He always orders the same food - Japanese fried chicken, salmon nigiri and chicken teriyaki rolls. 
Kobe is my foodie.  He loves his food and is always asking for it! If we are out you can guarantee that he's going to be 'hungry' and just desperately needs me to buy him something to eat.  So he was extra excited that I let him choose to go somewhere for dessert on his birthday.  He chose to go to Charlies and Tim, Helene and Ava joined us. It was lovely having them join us because really I felt a bit sad all day, that Jay was away and it was just the three of us. 
They gave Kobe some footy cards as a part of his birthday present, and Haz and Tim had fun sorting them out. 
 Best day ever!
We didn't feel like cake after all that delicious food, but had to light the candles (or sparkler) and sing and ate the cake later in the week. 
My birthday was in the middle of the month and I've now officially hit middle age as I'm 45.  It's always weird to think that I'm getting older and Aaron is always going to be 39.  I was really spoilt and got some lovely gifts from friends and my students made me gorgeous cards. 

My friend Simone is always so thoughtful and made sure that I was doing something for my birthday.  I had already planned on going out for tea to make the day easier, and Tim and Helene and their kids and Simone and Flynn joined us.  It was lovely because Jay was home from Uni for it as well. 
I feel like my group of friends is a lot smaller than it used to be for different reasons, and I often feel really sad about it, so I'm really grateful for these guys who are always there no matter what.
Noah's birthday was later in the month and he would've been turning 18.  It's really hard to imagine him being that old.   I have such mixed feelings about wishing he were still with us, but also knowing how selfish that is because it wouldn't be fair for him to be here in his sick, disabled body.  His last year with us was so hard and although I would love to kiss his chubby cheeks again and to see him smile when I squeezed his leg, he was just so tired in the end and only holding on for us.

Because I had a staff meeting and didn't get home till later, we raced to the cemetery with some balloons and it was actually a really lovely time because the sun was just setting.
 
Unfortunately the sign at the entrance of the cemetery says that the gates shut at 5pm. We arrived just before 5 and I was worried we would get locked in, so it was hard to relax and spend much time there.  They never actually lock the gates when they say, but knowing our luck we would risk staying too late one night, and we would have to leave our car and walk home. 
 I actually coped okay on Noah's birthday this year.  I think Kobe's birthday was probably harder, because I just wish Aaron was here to watch his boys get older and be a part of their lives.  As much as I wish Noah was still here with us, I wouldn't wish for him to be back in his tired, disabled body.  It's so strange to have such mixed emotions about it.  On the other hand I don't see any good out of Aaron passing away, and think things should be so different.
I hope they were partying hard together with my Dad as it was also his birthday on the same day as Noah's.

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