Needing Some Time Out

It's ironic that as I've been preparing to speak at Time Out For Women in Sydney next weekend, that I feel like I need some time out, more than ever.    Preparing to speak at TOFW has drained me a lot as I once again get my story down to share.  Even though I live it every day, there's something about sharing it that makes things really hard all over again.  I'm grateful for the opportunity to share my story though as it means that Aaron and Noah aren't forgotten.  I always have a lot of people tell me I should write a book, but I really don't think I would ever have the emotional energy to do it, with everything else I have to do at the same time. If I could just go on a holiday for a year and write, then I think I could cope with it ;)

I'm feeling physically and emotionally run down, as I have so much going on at the moment,  and as much as I would love some real time out, I know next weekend won't really be that at all, but it will be a great experience and I'm looking forward to it (if I can get over the nerves of standing in front of thousands of people to speak!).

It's been exciting to have emails back and forth to the producer of the event, and to hear how the weekend will run.  I'm very excited about meeting the other presenters, and am especially excited to hear Sandra and David sing.  

I'm so grateful to my friend Alison who put together a introductory video which will be played before I speak.  We spent a couple of days filming and doing the voice over, and then she spent many hours putting it all together. Thanks Alison - you're a lifesaver!
The video tells our 'story' so that I don't have to spend time during my talk telling people my story. She has done a great job, and it makes me cry when I watch it, but is beautiful. I love that for some of it we are sitting in Noah's memorial garden at school.

During the week TOFW posted that they were running a competition for anyone who had registered to go to the event, to win breakfast with the presenters (I don't make the official list of presenters as I was added later as a 'local presenter'). 

My cheeky brother Chrish sent me this text when he saw it pop up on Facebook. 

I've been having a good laugh with some work colleagues at school, saying how this year has been very exciting with the Mother of the Year awards and now speaking at TOFW next weekend, and how boring life will be again when it's all over.  They've been joking about how I'll have to go on Dancing with the Stars or start up my own perfume line next or something ;) 

My friend Leanne (who was awarded the National Mother of the Year) is so thoughtful and kind and found this. It was so lovely of her to buy it for me and I love that it has the words 'Living Proof' in it, as that's the theme for TOFW this year. 

My beautiful friend Naomi and cousin Carli often send me cards for no particular reason, and it's been lovely to get beautiful cards from them wishing me well as I prepare to speak next weekend.  I need all the luck I can get as I'm definitely not a public speaker, so I hope the nerves won't get the better of me, and hopefully sharing our story will help someone, somehow.  Right now all I want is Aaron and Noah back, and I would give up all the excitement of the past year, to just have them here.