Jay thinks he is hilarious and often sends me text messages (even when he's sitting across the other side of the room) complete with pictures of cute little puppies.
Jay however isn't keen on giving up his dream of a dog, and keeps asking me when we can get one. Whenever he sees a dog he is all over it and gives me the puppy dog eyes as he says 'don't you want one Mum!?'.
It doesn't help that my brother Christian just got a black Labrador puppy and the boys keep seeing photos of her and keep saying that they want her. Chrish loves teasing the with photos of her, so I'm hoping when we go and visit him soon that they will be happy with just spending some time with her. I'm doubting it though!
When I talk to him seriously about how much work a dog would be, and how he wouldn't be able to spend as much time on the computer, he then says that maybe he's not really ready for a dog and starts to change his mind, but then a week later he is begging me for a dog again.
One day he hijacked my phone and sent himself a text message, pretending it was from me. I didn't find it till about half an hour later when he sent me a text from his own phone. He definitely has his Dad's sense of humour.
I also have lots of concerns about getting a dog including whether we could afford the cost of a dog, and what kind of dog would be best, what sex is best and even where to get one from. We love the look of cavoodles, labradoodles and cockapoos but really have no idea about breeds and what would be best for a family who has no clue what they're doing.
I know that if we did get one then I would want one that is small or medium sized, that doesn't shed or bark very much and could be inside. Maybe I should just buy Jalen a soft toy dog, but somehow I don't think he'll settle for that.
you could let him help a neighbour with a dog... or maybe there is an animal shelter around... he could walk the dogs or something like that... and if he does a responsible job you can talk about an own again...
ReplyDeleteHayden also dislikes animals but even he likes the labradoodle or the Groodle, the problem with buying not shedding dogs is they are expensive because they have been specifically bred that way. You definitely want a short haired dog as getting them clipped is a pain! And one that has a nice temperament and isn't a barker. They do make you feel a lot safer at home though and are always happy to see you, maybe Jay could come up with some solutions for what you could do with the Dog when you want to go away (it stays with your mum on the farm) because I think if that's the only thing holding you back then their are more benefits. Jay would have to commit to feeding and pooper scooping though (worst job ever) Maybe get serious and then he WILL change his mind haha. We've always had female dogs and had them desexed, they don't go around humping everything. Dogs are definitely loyal companions...hmm I haven't helped at all hey?!
ReplyDeleteI just want to say, since Collette never really looked after her own dog, she probably isn't the best authority -- I think she proves that Mums just get left with the job when the novelty wears off.
DeleteHaving said that- When Dad died Mum went and got me a cat, or did I have the cat before he died? I can't remember.. But the cat helped, a lot. Grief is a very lonesome business and I was having horrible trouble making connections with people .. But I told the cat everything you could ever possibly imagine, and she helped because we formed a bond.
I was headed back to some form of new normal when the cat got hit by a car and Mum ended up spending copious amounts of money to try and keep it alive because she didn't think I could take another hit and it did survive, only to run away again later. Clearly I loved the cat more than it loved me.
On the other hand... Mum told me not to get a dog and I still did and she was great company and we were totes in love until I got married and grew up and realised looking after a dog is way, way, way down on my list of things to do. When she dies, I'll take some convincing to get another. Because I realise Im mow the Mum so I'll get stuck with it.
I would definitely recommend getting a dog. I was "iffy" about getting one 2 years ago, but I am SO glad we got it. I feel so safe when I am home alone, especially at night. He barks only when he hears something strange outside or when someone knocks at the door. He is especially protective of my 3 year old. The dog is a German Shepherd mix (not sure what he is mixed with). It will be more expensive to get a pure-bred dog, and mutts (mixed breeds) are just as lovable :-) I'm not sure if Australia has animal shelters/pounds for unwanted animals like we have here, but if so, check there first. We actually got our dog off a website called Craigslist - not sure if y'all have that there, either. Good luck!
ReplyDeleteLisa,
ReplyDeleteI tried to resist giving my opinion as I don't live with you and will have no part in caring for the dog, however, I really, really think a dog would be a wonderful idea for everybody (yes, even you) all around. They are great companions, help with depression, lower blood pressure and just make such great, loyal friends. They are adorable and most of the time it is not a problem finding someone who would love to take them in for a short time while you go away. I, for one, could never live without a dog. Americans get extremely attached to their pets. Anyway, should you decide, please check out the homeless pet shelters first. Those dogs just seem to understand that you have rescued them and become so faithful. Good luck in deciding and I'll put another vote in for Jalen. Jalen 1, Lisa 0. jk
Here's a vote for Jalen. =)
ReplyDeleteAnd another vote for Jalen;) Our dog is a mixture of a berner sennen (a swiss breed) and a friese stabij (a dutch breed) she has a nice medium size and is absolutely lovable! her fur is medium as well, we don't have to trim her and the hairs are nice and soft so they don't get stuck in the couch;)
ReplyDeleteLove your family and your blog!
Angela from Germany
I fell into a really bad depression a few years back, and had to move back in with my folks...things got pretty nasty. One day my dad came home with a puppy, and I thought he was off his rocker! However, I cannot believe the amount of happiness this fuzzy little animal brought into my life.
ReplyDeleteThis may be a little too intense, but I would seriously consider looking for an organization there in AU that trains therapy dogs. Soldiers, people with health issues, and those suffering from depression greatly benefit from them. (I'm not saying you would need to take them to stores etc) but the way these animals are trained to SENSE when someone is feeling down, is so amazing.
Also, if your boys don't mind not getting a puppy and just getting a dog that is a little grown-go for that! As cute as puppies are, man, they are quite the handleful and might have you regretting the decision. However, they can be trained, you just have to be patient when they go through their terrible "2s" (around 4-6months)
I would suggest a beagle, corgi, Weiner dog, or king Charles spaniel. The beagle would be the biggest, however they aren't that big at all! King Charles spaniel has longer hair, but nothing that takes too much up keep (and they are amazing with children)
Praying for you and your family, you all have been through so much !always in my prayers.
http://animal.discovery.com/pets/10-small-dog-breeds-for-therapy-work.htm
http://dogsfordepression.org.uk/how-dogs-help-us.html
Why not offer to look after your brothers dog for a week? I guarantee watering, feeding, taking for walks will be fun. But picking up dog poop, which is part of dog ownership could be a deal breaker. If the boys can do that then maybe their ready for responsiblitiy. Good luck Lisa...lol
ReplyDeleteI totally agree with what carolyne b says here! If the boys had a week to try it first they might change their minds. You have to think about getting up early to take it outside when it is raining, snowing, etc. The barking, puppies pee in the house, mud on the floor, puppies chew toys. Can you tell...I am not a dog person either! lol
DeleteAnimals are great but don't be pressured into getting a dog if you are not sure. Give it some time.
P.S. How about a cat instead?
Look into getting a Shihtzu, they are small, loving and usually do not bark. I have 3 friends with this kind of dog, and they are the greatest! They do not shed either!!
ReplyDeleteAwww, I have to vote with Jalen, for sure!
ReplyDeleteWe've always had dogs, but big dogs. Labs, Rottweilers, Springer Spaniels, Golden Retreivers are just a few. My daughter (at age 11) wanted a small dog. I was pretty against it, but after a year of her showing us that she was responsible enough, we broke down and got her a 5-lb fur ball. I can NOT imagine my life without that little dog! She is the highlight of our days now.
I strong encourage you to look into a little more. It would greatly benefit the entire family. :)
Do your research though, so you can find a dog that fits with your family and your needs. I promise you, you will not regret it!
Right now we have a yellow lab and then our small Shih Tzu/Maltese and they get along fabulous.
I do have to say it's a little harder traveling or planning day trips away. Not because of the big dog, but the little one. Our yellow lab can stay home alone all day and be perfectly fine, but not our little one. She has to be let out after about 4 hours since she's so tiny, so take those things into consideration, too.
Look into a Springer Spaniel. They medium size (around 40-50 lb), very mellow animals. They do not shed, but they do have to be clipped (we did ours every 3 months). I learned this when we were doing our research for my daughter ... any dog that does NOT shed will have to be groomed.
Good luck and happy dog hunting! (you won't regret it!)
I agree 100% about the Springer Spaniel. Our beloved Springer passed away after a very pampered 14 years of life. After almost 2 years, we still talk about him and miss him every day. My children were from 4-12 when we got him and he made such a wonderful influence in their lives. Yes, we had days in his puppyhood when I wondered if he was worth it, but he matured into a wonderful member of our family. He wasn't a barker and always greeted us at the door with a toy. He was truly a member of our family. Whatever breed you decide on, I would highly recommend obedience training, with the entire family involved. Our dog did some therapy in nursing homes and veterans hospitals and it was a great experience too. I've always said, "every kid needs a dog, and every dog needs a kid." Good luck!
DeleteI am in the same boat as you, in that everyone in my family wants a dog, but me. All I think about is picking up the poop and making sure it goes out a number of times a day. On the other hand, our family loves animals and we pretty much have (or had) everything, but a dog. Right now we have a hamster, a guinea pig, a holland lop bunny, a greek tortoise, fish and a cat. In the past we've also had parakeets and a hedgehog. I do feel that any kind of pet would bring joy and happiness to your family. When you are caring for another person or animal, your attention and focus are directed to them. The hamster and tortoise are the easiest to take care of, but I think a dog would be perfect for your family...just think of all the doggy hugs and snuggles and it could sleep with the boys and would probably get them outside more too!
ReplyDeleteDogs are A LOT of work. They chew things, they ruin things, they demand a lot of attention...I could go on. BUT, they do help with depression. They do give children the love that sometimes, we parents, cannot provide for them. We have a golden retriever. She is excellent with kids. She does not bark. But, she sheds. And sheds. Maybe a golden doodle?? There are lots of websites out there that will suggest good breeds for families. Do research before jumping into it!! Maybe someone near you could let you "borrow" their dog for a few days to see what its like. I would be happy to let you borrow mine :) Too bad I live in the US!
ReplyDeleteWe have four Bouvier des Flanders (between 65-90 lbs). They are the most loving dogs I have ever been around. They don't shed, but must be groomed. However, grooming isn't hard, I brush them once a week (takes 30 min. total for four dogs) and clip their hair myself (it's easy) about every six weeks. If they don't get brushed weekly, their coats will get matted and that will either call for a bigger brushing job or a super short clip. Plus a matted coat is uncomfortable and kinda rude.
ReplyDeleteI have found that a dog that gets plenty of exercise (a walk 35-45 minute every day) doesn't chew on everything. A puppy will do his share of chewing for sure, but a well adjusted adult might have a favorite toy or bone and can be taught to leave anything else alone. We have had both male and female dogs. I prefer the disposition of a male (neutered) male.
As for the cost. I feed my adult dogs between 3-4 cups of dog food each day for I spend around $75/monthly on food (for four dogs). I make treats for them out of anything vegetable and meat scraps. So that's sort of a savings because I never throw out any food. Also for treats, I feed them cut up fruits and veggies. I spend an average of $250 yearly on vet bills. (that includes all four dogs and a cat)
Cleaning up dog crap in the yard isn't anyones favorite job, but if you stay on top of it, you'll spend 30 seconds per day doing the job instead of a stinky afternoon once per month.
A dog will be a best friend, a loyal companion and valiant protector. For me, that's a pretty easy trade off for the money and work involved. But you do have to consider that a dog can live upwards of 20 years and for us, they're family, so we would never part with them. It is a big commitment, but so worth it. I wish you the best with your decision.
We did not want another dog to look after, but we are now the proud owners of a 100lb Golden Retriever named Blue. He is not a therapy dog, but pups from other litters and some of his siblings go to an organization here in the US called, "PAWS with purpose." They are trained as therapy dogs. Our situation is certainly not not the same as yours, but Blue has bought such a calming and healing to our little boy who has Autism. He sheds all over which drives me nuts, but the benefits have far outweighed the negatives. Sometimes a boy just needs a dog......
ReplyDeleteA Lhasa Apso or Shih-tzu would make a nice quiet, house friendly pet. They are like a live stuffed animal. Seriously, best behaved dogs ever.
ReplyDeletePS I have been following your blog for awhile now and sure do enjoy your posts! You have some cute kids!
ReplyDeleteWith love from New Mexico USA.
We used to have dogs but no more because they were so much trouble:always chewing the carpet,fence,etc., barking, making a mess, ruining things,going to the bathroom everywhere, being destructive, smelly,and noisy. They just ended up being a burden and more trouble than they were worth and caused lots of conflict and it just wasn`t worth it.
ReplyDeleteI meant to add, as many others have, do your research on what kind of dog would work best with your family. Our boy needed a dog that was gentle, but could withstand a little boy who isn't always that way himself. Blue is a very social dog and as a consequence has helped Sam to be more social. Blue has been easy to train - the total of 2 accidents in the house. You will find the right mix if you decide to take the leap :)
ReplyDeleteCan you offer to foster a dog from anywhere? And see how a short term placement goes? And if so, buy one? And if not and the novelty wears off quickly, you know it is only for a short time! Good luck with your decision.
ReplyDeleteWe have a Springer spaniel and I'm convinced they are the best family dog. We love the breed! She is very kind and very gentle. But also can be protective if she senses danger. Anyone who comes to our house wants to take her home!
ReplyDeleteWe have a miniature poodle & she rocks, she is loved by everyone doesn't shed, comes inside, house trained herself & is no trouble at all. The only thing that you have to remember is that any of the poodle dogs need clipping & in summer it's a once a month thing at $55 a pop. Other than that cost we have all the normal costs like food & vet stuff & heartworm etc. I love kids having dogs my boys are 14 & 18 & they just cuddle up to her & spoil her beyond belief....
ReplyDeleteI've heard that greyhounds are very placid and there are lots of places that do greyhound rescues (ie from the racing industry). I knew someone who got a rescue dog then returned it for another one based on temperament, so it's nice to know you're supported in the adoption. Getting a dog that's older than a puppy is also a good idea - 2nd dog was 4 when I got him, and much easier to handle.
ReplyDeleteI had two daschunds (consecutively). Brilliant dogs, friendly and with a great sense of fun - everyone loved those dogs. But do research the temperament they're bred with - daschunds love hunting, sniffing and chasing scents, because it's bred into them, so walking the dog was about them following a scent - and if they got a sniff of a cat in the street, they'd run after it. Not too difficult, but we just made sure the yard was well-fenced, and he couldn't go out without a leash.
It's worth researching breeds whose temperament suits what you're able to handle. Also, it would be investigating their usual life expectancy and/or common health issues... smaller dogs seem tougher. My last doggie had a good life of 14 years.
It is SO worth getting a dog. They're like kids - all the work (and poo!) doesn't seem so bad because you love who they are :-)
If you do get a dog, don't forget you have to get a dog lincence from the LCC and they have gone up especially for show-breeds. And if it barks neighbours could complain and it must be removed. Yes they're friendly but they smell and enough has been written about dog poop. Not that it helps if Jalen has his mind set on one!
ReplyDeleteRobin
WOW! I hope Jalen doesn't read all these comments - he will think it's a done deal!!!!!!!!
ReplyDeletekeep going Jay. Your mom is going to crack any second...I can tell!! xx
ReplyDeleteI'm on Jalen's side on this one.
ReplyDeleteWe had a beagle for 18 years and when she passed away MUm swore to never have another dog but Dad insisted and we got out Cocker Spaniel who really does bring happiness into all of our lives. We also have greyhound which make fantastic pets, although they do shed a little. They're couch potatoes though :)
Trying rescuing a dog from the shelter or RSPCA - You can often skip the puppy years and most have basic obedience training. They are much cheaper and come fully vaccinated, wormed and desexed.
Don't go for smaller dogs liek terriers - the yapping will make you go mental!
As for knowing that the boys will stop doing their chores & you will have to look after the dog, there is an easy solution. The first time the boys slack off, get the dog and aim towards the car telling them that he/she is going to the RSPCA so they will have owners that are responsible and caring.
The chores will be completed before you and the dog make it to the car!!! (I feel for it on more than one occasion ;-) )
My dog got me through my teenage years. My staffy was a great listener and happy to cuddle when I needed. I remember trying to get out of the clean up tho.
ReplyDeletehmmm...sorry, another vote for Jay from Utah. One of my daughters was struggling with some heavy things, and as I was praying for ways to help her, the thought came that she needed a dog to love, a companion that would love her unconditionally. Do you think it's strange to make it a matter of prayer? Heavenly Father will help you decide on if it's right for you and your boys. We got a cute Yorkie-poo two months ago, so far so good. Best of luck Lisa!
ReplyDeleteAnother vote for Jalen, you will never regret getting a dog. Just like babies and children the work involved is worth it ten times over. I have a 10 week old Puppy and even I can still say that, and believe me he is a lot of work. Our darling dog passed away in April and we just weren't us without a dog. Dogs give back so much more than you can ever give them. My husband works nights and our previous dog was the best companion ever. They comfort you when you're sad and make life brighter. My son lost 10 family members and friends in our previous dog's lifetime and was devastated when our dog passed as he had always been the one to comfort him. Barking requires good training and the rest of the work when grown is minimal when looking at the big picture. I agree a Shih Tzu would be a good choice, our puppy is a Shih Tzu Maltese cross and just adorable.
ReplyDeleteMy vote is for Jalen!!!! Puppies are a lot of work but the dog you get in the end will be so worth it!!!! My kids were 6 and 4 when we got our dog and all the work did fall on me, but our Millie is a wonderful dog. I think your Jalen is old enough to do a lot of things for the dog. In the states, they even encourage the older kids to come to training classes, I bet Jalen would LOVE that! Our son was very fearful of dogs before we got ours and now he is like the dog whisperer. You need a puppy!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteMy vote is for Jalen too (sorry)! We have two boys, nearly 13 and 10, and they're different kids since owning a dog - they absolutely love having a 'little brother' to dote on! We have a 2 year old Bichon Frise and he's such a fantastic family dog (cheaper than the 'designer' breeds too!!)! He's small to medium sized, loyal, incredibly loving, cuddly, goofy, intelligent, and doesn't bark unless he hears noises or somebody approaches the house (definitely NOT a yappy breed). He also doesn't shed OR smell - and as a result he gets to cuddle up at night on the bed (he even goes so far as to 'spoon' me occasionally)! He does require clipping every 6-8 weeks and will knot up if his coat gets ignored, so he gets a bath and brushing about every fortnight (takes less than 10 mins), and I keep his coat fairly short (doesn't have to be done by a groomer). Other than that the only work involved is to feed him and walk him (but being small he's happy just catching a ball in the yard). Our general costs, besides food (cat-tin sized meat (one a day), plus a little bag of biscuits that lasts a month!) are his annual shots/de-worming etc at the vet, summer flea treatments, and his annual dog registration. Initially, the costs were higher - purchase price, de-sexing, puppy school, bed, crate, collar/lead, toys, etc. And yes, the puppy stage is more work, but if you're strict and consistent with the training, then it should pass fairly pain-free.
ReplyDeleteWe also love to travel A LOT and our solution is to ask a friend to house-sit/dog-sit for us. If we're heading out for just a few hours, the dog gets a rawhide bone to keep him busy, and can come and go as he pleases out his doggy door! Keeps any destructive behaviour at bay!
I agree that a dog will be amazing therapy for you all. Perhaps even help fill empty gaps eventually? And think of it as a stage - yes, about a 15yr stage, but worth every single year, I think! Lovely company. You also meet so many new people while walking and socialising a dog! Good luck!
We have labradoodle and he is the most beautiful, sweet natured, gorgeous dog. He is big though, but doesn't shed. All the oodles need clipping a couple of times a year, so factor that in to the expense side of things. Cavoodles are absolutely beautiful dogs - I have had two Cavalier King Charles spaniels and anything with CKCS in it, I can guarantee will have the most divine nature.
ReplyDeleteDogs are therapeutic, there is no doubt about it....and they are great for kids. I absolutely love the bond my dogs have with my kids, it teaches them empathy and responsibility and caring for another living being. I wouldn't actually say the novelty wears off as such, although guess who picks up the poop these days......
The going away issue - I'm not going to lie, that can be a pain. However, if you can find a good kennel and get to know the owners, kennelling for a couple of days for one dog is really not that expensive and my dogs love it. I book mine into the Penthouse suite at our local kennel and it's around $17 a day per dog.
Also, there are some dog rescue sites on the net and sometimes you'll get cavoodles/labradoodles that people can't deal with for whatever reason.
Do it......and surprise them with the puppy...it will be a memory they'll take with them into adulthood and very possibly the rest of their lives xxx
Another vote for a dog. :). Every kid needs a dog and every dog needs a kid. :)
ReplyDeleteWe have a cockapoo and we call him 'therapy dog'. Whenever someone is sad, hurt or doesn't want to wake up for school we call Toby. He is wonderful--Doesn't bark except to alert us and is the perfect size for kids who like to play ball. The draw back is for sure when we go places. Good luck deciding.
ReplyDeleteMy vote is definitely for Jalen. I could give you numerous reasons for my opinion but the bottom line is that a dog would be beneficial for each of you. Go for it! Go Jalen!!!
ReplyDeleteNot sure what costs are like in Australia, but here in the states you can get a dog from the Humane Society for around $200 (it will be fixed and have basic shots). We got an adorable beagle/schnauzer cross that was 4 months old and he has been a wonderful dog (he is 4 now). He weights about 35 pounds and food costs about $35 a month. Shots are $100 yearly.
ReplyDeletewe've had dogs all my life, when our last lovely dog passed away in november (age 19!) my mum said that was it, no more dogs...she lasted until january 5th and we now have a 7 month old cockapoo.
ReplyDeletehonestly, everyone has said it, it is a much happier house since we've had him, every single day he makes us smile, as long as you give the dog your routine from the get go, we work on a rota for walking and theres no better excuse to get out of the house, whenever someones sad he instantly makes them happy, they're brilliant for depression
on this one, i'd say dont overthink it, just do it! xx
HI Lisa I emailed you before about this very thing so I was so happy to see this post. I think you should get a dog from the humane shelter- I doubt you will regret it. Kids and dogs go hand and hand. I love my dog- he listens to me, always eats the same thing without complaints and loves me all the time.
ReplyDeleteJulie
My vote is for Jalen, it will completely change his life and will help heal him. I was VERY anti dog and am now the doting owner of 3 schnauzers, 2 minis and 1 giant. they have hair and so don't shed or smell. very intelligent,love children and are very loyal
ReplyDelete